Saturday, June 19, 2010

Nope, can't do it....

OK, so typical of my luck...COURT WAS CANCELLED.... And no one bothered to tell us, and didn't care that we drove an hour to get there....Talk about pissed.... This girl was HOT! I already had to cancel my plans because of this, and now the judge can't show up? I had even asked my lawyer if we could change the day because my sister invited us to go to Holiday World, and since the babies had never been, and it would be FUN, I was going to take them... And I had already paid before the ex stopped paying me...(luckily I got my money back).

Anyway, no court=no money still. When I said something to my lawyer (who I happened to run into at the courthouse) he was like, well.... that was something I was going to bring up today. Well WTF? Now I just wait another 10 days until the next court date?? Oh well, it has been this long, why not?

To illustrate how ridiculously BRAZEN the ex is.... HE DROVE TO COURT! Yep, he has no license, yet he drives to court (which is right next to the Sheriff's Office). I guess he figured I would be late (like I usually am) and he could slip in/out without me noticing, but I was early for once. Come to think of it, I bet he drove last time too, cause I never saw anyone waiting for him (only I didn't see him drive either). Anyway, after he saw me & my parents standing there (I saw him standing by his truck talking on the phone) he disappeared. And when I left he was no where in sight. I figure he had someone come fetch him, or he just went around the corner until we left.... There was nothing I could do... Even my lawyer saw him... But since he was already out of the truck, we couldn't prove it!!! yep, my luck people.

I PASSED my drug test. Well obviously I would... But even though I knew I hadn't done anything, I always get nervous just because. Actually, I have NEVER failed a drug test... But I am a nervous type, and always think the someone rigged it, or I had a false positive etc.. I bet he failed miserably, but there is no way I can find out, until court (if they tell me then). I would LOVE to tell that judge to apologize to me for calling me out saying I am an addict, I bet she won't!!! Do you think now they will give me sole-custody, I highly doubt it, but I can hope! My Dad wrote 5 letters and sent out yesterday morning to some official people (LOL) to get some help. My children should be able to have a safe and secure life without being exposed to drugs and criminal activity.

On a good note... The BF got promoted at work, and he got a raise, and now he can fire people, LOL. I am so excited for him, it is about time they notice what a treasure he is... He works his butt off! Now, if they would give him some insurance, we would be all set:)

Last night my sister took us out to eat (thanks sister, lol). We were all sitting there waiting for our food when I gasped in shock... My son PEED on my foot and in the seat of the booth. It was a strange experience. Luckily we had some diapers in the car... I am not even sure why the BF put him in underwear when he knew we were going out? He has only successfully used the potty a few days... Anyway, we still had fun...

Tonight baby girl started crying... She said her poop wouldn't come out and it hurt. Then she started screaming/crying help me, help me. OMG, I had no idea what to do, and it was an awful situation!! I didn't know how to help her, and probably couldn't anyway.... And I KNOW how bad that can hurt, dang, and she is little so it is probably even worse. Poor kid. It finally passed and she was OK. When I changed her (cause she still won't do it in the potty) I can understand why she was crying, OUCH!! I think I will start giving her some miralax til she gets straightened out, cause no child should have to be in pain, ever!!

Hope u all have a good weekend......

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

YAY.... BOO!

Go ahead, take a peek into my brain, I dare ya, ROFL!!!! There is always a good and bad way to look at everything, dontcha think?

I actually made it to school this morning.......... Yay

I have homework tonight, LOTS!........... Boo

It is pretty easy homework though...... Yay

I have to go to court again tomorrow.......... Boo

Maybe they will MAKE him give me some money....... Yay  (but don't hold your breath)

I will have to face that B*TCH A$$ JUDGE....... Boo

I will probably be divorced by tomorrow afternoon....... Yay

It makes me sick to my stomach to think about it....... Boo

But I know I will be better off......... Yay

My kids are going with Satan tonight....... Boo

I will be able to do homework, maybe go to bed early...... Yay

He has started letting his psycho girlfriend watch them on his days...... Boo

I started talking to my best-friend again......... Yay

She is Satan's oldest daughter....... Boo

I may be getting some money from school....... Yay

It will probably take a month to get....... Boo

My truck is paid for........ Yay

It is getting ready to blow up...... Boo

My dad may let me borrow his car....... Yay

It is tiny with 2 doors and is a standard....... Boo

2 months ago, I didn't think life could get any worse........ Yay

It did........ Boo

My babies used the potty all weekend....... Yay

Satan had them in a diaper when I picked them up yesterday......... Boo

This was a pretty fun way to sum up everything I have on my mind, have you ever tried it? I am sure I was inspired by another blogger somewhere who did this (yay), but I can't remember which one (boo)!!!!!

Love to all my followers:) Thanks for keeping my spirits up.... I am looking forward to getting back to the real me, the happy-go-lucky girl I used to be, before life dealt me some lemons.  I do have the lemonade recipe though, I am working on it feverishly!!!

Sunday, June 13, 2010

Wait Mommie, I forgot to give you a hug and a kiss!!!

My baby girl is so cute!!  Before she leaves me every Sunday to go with the devil, she says, "wait Mommie I forgot to give you a hug and a kiss."  Today she was asleep when we arrived to make the switch, and when I woke her up she said it (almost in her sleep), it was just too precious!  Not only does she do it to me, she does it to her Nana, bigtime. I think once she gave Nana like 20 hugs and kisses... Mom (Nana) would get half way up the street and Miss P would start screaming and crying and jumping up and down saying it... It was funny.  Finally Mom took off running to her house (which is the next house up, across the street), and Miss P was just devasted, but as soon as Nana was out of sight, the tears stopped and she was talking 100 miles an hour again about anything and everything....

I was proud of the little people today!  They BOTH wore underwears (that is how they say it... underwears) all day and did not have 1 single accident!  Maybe, just maybe they will be out of the diapers soon.  I hope so, cause they are getting way to big for me to have to explain why they are still in diapers!  The only thing I can say is.... Miss P (at 3 and 1/2) is stubborn and absolutely refuses to go to the potty sometimes!!  She has always been great with #1, but she refuses to go #2 in the potty.... She will cry and scream to put a diaper on.... I have no idea why she can't do both in the bathroom, but maybe she will get over it soon.  My little Bubby (at 2 and 1/2) has showed no interest until now, but he picked right up on it yesterday and did a mighty fine job!!  He would tell us today that he had to go.  I hope Satan continues with the underwear and doesn't just shove them back in a diaper.... cause that will send them into a set back....  ANYWAY.....

Hope things start looking up soon....

Friday, June 11, 2010

We had fun tonight!!!

I am so tired of thinking about everything bad going on in life!!  So tonight I am going to post about what a good time we had.  Just sitting at home being together.

The other day my kids brought home a little music CD from McDonald's (they call it Macky Donald's, LOL) or wherever they had went that day with Nana.  So tonight I popped it in the DVD player and the music quickly filled the air, and their little blue eyes lit up.  If they didn't think I was silly already, they do now.... I started dancing and laughing and they stood there aghast with their little mouths hanging open. 

But it didn't take long for the laughter to commence.... And little Bubby was the first to let his legs buckle at the knees and start to join in on the fun.  He was bouncing with the beat and grinning from ear to ear.  Then Miss Priss started screaming.... "shake your booty Mommie."  I love to hear giggles from babies, there is nothing better, and after they started I got even more into it.

I grabbed 2 hair brushes and handed them to each one of them to use as a microphone.  I grabbed Bubby's arms and danced across the floor with him.... then I slung him unto my hip and did circles and spun him around.  After a while he got heavy so I put him down, then I grabbed up the BF and we danced happily while the babies watched and cheered us on.  Finally the BF grabbed Bubby, and I grabbed Miss Priss and we were all spinning, twirling, laughing, and dancing until we were breathless. 

It was the best time we have had in a long time.... For a minute I forgot about all the problems we struggle with everyday and we were just able to be free and enjoy life:)  I hope no matter what my kids do without, fun will not be on the list.  We can still love each other and have fun and live happily. if nothing else, we have each other, and that is all that matters!!

Wednesday, June 9, 2010

Things are getting worse....

Being without any form of income (for over a month now) is starting to catch up with me, fast.  At first things were all good.  I was kind of caught up, I had money in my pocket, etc. Now, not so much.....

I couldn't pay the rent. I wrote my land-lady a letter explaining what is going on, and that I would catch up as soon as possible. I figured she would understand since a) I have NEVER not paid her, and b) I have NEVER been late...  Well she is not taking the news all that well.  She called to tell me that she can't make any payments without that money (I do understand that, honestly I do), I just don't know what to tell her? And keep in mind it is only the 8th of the month when she calls....

I tried to get money from the school, and I may be able to, but it will be at least 30 days.  They are now not letting people get any money for 30 days after the term starts because some students come to class 1 time, get a check, then never come back (or they do it all over again the next term)... Obviously I am not one of those kinds of students because a) I had almost perfect attendance, and b) I made straight A's.  But it doesn't matter cause one bad apple spoils the bunch, right?

I called my lawyer CRYING... told him I was about to be evicted because I can't pay the rent.... He was less than helpful... asked me if the EX had made any payments since the last court date (OBVIOUSLY NOT)... and he said he would send a letter to the EX's lawyer telling her we would bring it up in court the next time we go (the 16th)... Thanks a lot.... Glad it is my kids and not YOURS that are going to be homeless!! 

Now onto my next situation.... Why do people tell me to get a JOB when.....
-I am a full-time college student
-I have 2 small children I have to be home with (who would watch them, and if they did how would I pay for it anyway?)
-I can't even find a f*cking job
-I had a great mother f*cking job until I married a f*cking loser who told me to quit my great f*cking job, and he would take care of us, then he left us for a f*cking whore that worked at the f*cking gas station, and then he told her to quit her f*cking job, now he takes care of her ugly f*cking a$$ and her kids.  And he f*cking forgot that he has 2 little kids, and it takes f*cking money to raise them!!

We did go to church on Sunday with my grandparents.... At least that made my heart feel a little better:)

Friday, June 4, 2010

Brokedown, Busted, and Disgusted!!!

Let's start with the anger issues, shall we?  On Tuesday when the ex (Satan) met me to pick the kids up, his Mistress (as in the Devil's Mistress, LOL) was driving him around (remember he has no license because of the arrests)... They also had HER youngest kid with them. Anyway, obviously I hate this B*TCH and everytime I see her, or know that she is going to be around my children, my blood starts boiling, and I lose my freakin' mind!

Satan owes me $1250. (this Tuesday it will be $1450.).... He has not paid me a penny in almost a month. I honestly don't know how I am surviving... all I can say is BARELY.  Thank God for my Dad loaning me some cash last week (to keep my internet on). And thank the state for giving me money to buy food, or else my little munchkins would be starving (obviously they are not, look at them, LOL). And thanks to me for paying the electric bill ahead last time.

Now, when I saw them heading toward town to go out to eat, I lost my sh*t!!  I called this sorry excuse for a man and started screaming at him!!! I was wondering how if he couldn't pay his child-support could he afford to take the whole "fam damily" out to eat, or out on the town?  This is ridiculous people!!!! We can't live (I am officially late on my rent, which has never happened before)....but he can shove his big face full of eat out food!! How can he get away with it you ask? Well last time we went to court, his lawyer told the judge that he was broke and couldn't afford to pay me, and it may be 2/3 more weeks until he can.... So I am just out of luck... and my babies are too!

On another note..... Satan's lawyer called my boyfriend's boss. Oh.yes.she.did.... Asked him if I had ever been removed from the farm he works at.... WTF? Where do these people come up with the CRAP they accuse me of? I just went to one of the owner's funerals last month (the guy loved me).... And I have been in and out of there several times bringing the bf lunch and hanging out (never been one ounce of trouble).  My nephew even works there now...  The boss told her NO (never any trouble) but how much do you want to bet she brings it up in court anyway, and says I did it???? And how much more do you want to bet that the judge will believe her????  She also made up this story one time saying I was removed from my job and put in a rehab center (this NEVER happened either)... yet she said she had proof, but no one ever saw it.. And the judge never asks me if it is true or not.... just gets mad at me for speaking out, or interrupting in court.

I just can't keep fighting these people, and that is what they want... So I don't know what to do, it is all so unbelievable and PAINFUL.... You know it really hurts when someone attacks your character and says you are a bad person.... when in all honesty you have done nothing wrong. And the man you thought loved you took away everything you ever had (job, money, home, security, trust, family, pride, self-esteem, etc.) and he attacks you daily and shoves piles of sh*t in your face!!!!

The bf asked the boss if he would right a letter to the court to say this incident never happened, and guess what???? He said NO.... He said they could call him, but he wouldn't write anything out on paper... WHAT A JERK.... I guess people can't write out the truth anymore??  I wish that Jimmy (his other boss that just died) was still alive.... he would have went to court with me and told them they were full of it!!  He was one of those "good old guys" that used to always tell bf how nice I looked or how sweet I was, LOL....That always made me feel good:)

I swear if I don't get some money soon I am going to break-down..... I will no longer have gas to go to school or anywhere for that matter, money to pay any bills, no phone, no internet, no air-conditioning, no water, no lights, no diapers or wipes, no laundry detergent (just think of all the things it takes money to buy)......WOW

I can't get any help from the state (besides what I already get....) because he is supposed to pay a certain amount and that is what they count (not whether he pays or not).... And I can't have him arrested because his lawyer told the judge all that crap above..... Does the system not care about women and children who have nothing.... against a man that took it all???