Saturday, January 29, 2011

just as expected....

So many things going on around here....

Tuesday we had his "visitation."
Wedesday, the funeral.

I told the babies.... They don't really understand....
Baby girl has said, "I want to go to Heaven right now so I can be with my Daddy."
Little man said, "We will see him one day in Heaven. When I see my Daddy I am going to hug him on his face."

They CONSTANTLY talk about their Daddy. Saying they miss him, love him, etc. They ask me why I am sad, or why I cry because Daddy is in Heaven. I have kept it simple, no details. Every night before bed we all look up to the sky and wave and talk to him. They feel like he is watching over them, which I think helps to comfort them.

And as always, there is DRAMA! The new wife has filed a wrongful death suit. Of course we all saw that coming. If she can make one last dollar off of him it will be all the better for her. She sent her lawyer here to get me to sign something. He said it was on behalf of my kids, BUT it was really a paper that would get me to waive my rights, so they could proceed to settle his estate (half of which I remain listed on as owner). They don't realize that I AM NOT STUPID!

His oldest 2 sons are going around to all his farms stealing anything and everything they can get their hands on to sell, pawn, or use as scrap (to sell at the scrap yard).

His oldest daughter has started a law suit of her own. Every which way I turn someone is trying to make a profitt from his death.

Since we were in the process of settling our divorce, my name was never removed from the deed or mortgage of the farm we lived on. I have every right to EVICT her! Guess what I am going to do today?? Yep, I am going to hand deliver an eviction notice to her. I refuse to let her sit there in that house that the bank is going to hold ME responsible for! The only bad thing? I have to give her 30 days:(

The bank is going to come and take it all anyway because he was so far in debt... So it isn't as if I am going to gain anything from still being on the property.... I will just be able to remove her (which is satisfaction enough!).

He had some life insurance, which still had her name on it. She gets half, my kids get the other half. I have no idea how much it is, but it doubles because it was an accident. She has said "when I get my check I am out of here."

My kids will get a really awesome amount of social security benefits every month until they are 18. So that is a good thing. It is more than double what I should have gotten in child support...

For every cloud there is a silver lining. I am hoping this cloud will have one too. Please keep us in your thoughts and prayers......


  1. omg, Gayle, I have been thinking about you and came here just to check on you... I need to read up and see what happened. I'm so sorry!!

  2. Sad to think of his death as a blessing, but I so see it as such. Your kids only have good memories of their dad - none of the horrible ones that they were bound to have if he'd continued on his self-destructive lifestyle. Leaving his kids in your good care and financially taken care of is more than what would have happened otherwise. The sad part, is that it's taking his death for him to finally take care of his responsibilities.

    I love that you've allowed your kids the sense of security of him looking over them by doing the wave at the sky thing each night. That's a memory they'll savor their whole lives.

  3. You are such a great mom! Talking to the kids about their daddy is a good thing!

    Fight for everything that is yours for your kids!

  4. I am praying for the silver lining for you and your babies. You deserve it! Hugs!

  5. I am so sorry!

    It is hard to lose someone - especially when things were difficult and unresolved.

    Praying that your kids only have good memories and that the drama will go away. I am just so sorry.

  6. Thinking about you!! I really do hope you all are doing ok!

  7. I'm so sorry this sounds like such a struggle. Wishing you strength for yourself and the kiddos.


Give it to me straight from the heart.....